And that got me thinking about something a little bit unrelated, but close enough, that I’ve been thinking about while I’ve been taking summer classes.
I just really hate the tedium and structure of school, to the point that I sometimes wish that it were back in the day when it wouldn’t have been necessary for me have the responsibility of educating myself, and supporting myself, etc. I know that I would not actually enjoy that…I understand that the women’s rights movement happened for a reason, that it’s good to be educated and be self reliant.
I guess what I really want is the freedom to only do what I’m interested…I don’t think I’m stupid…I enjoy reading things, writing and learning about certain subjects…I just hate say, having to do fifteen Spanish excercises a day, or reading my microeconomics lecture.
And how work pertains to this…I feel like a lot of petty stuff goes on at jobs that’s not much of an improvement over high school, and I always felt that maybe in an office job it would be better, but whenever I say that to people they say it’s the same bullshit, just at a higher level. And of course my other concern is, what if I lose my job and can’t find another one? And I have no significant other to help support me, I’d be completely screwed.
This post is really just a stream of consciousness with a beginning that could be construed as offensive to women. I wasn’t trying to say that I wish the women’s rights movement hadn’t happened and that I wish I were cooped up in a house all day and forced into an arranged marriage…I just wish life was a bit more like Jane Austen…where I’d have a steady stream of suitors to pick from, I’d be able to live a life of relative leisure and pursue my own interests. I guess the equivalent now would be being a society lady. I don’t know how I’ll find a society man though.
I guess this ties into the email about the job I want because I worry about things not working out, and I wish I had some sort of safety net to fall back on.
Carry on, now.